I agree with most of that. I just started DCS a few days ago and have already hooked up on the tanker with the hornet. trim trim trim. And patience. Learn what is going on and adapt.
Quite frankly I got into DCS because of the depth of simulation. I don't think we need another "easy button" to water down the sim. But, having said that, I agree that the refueling thing needs a workover. It disconnects way too easily.