It depends
If you want to use Simple rendering AND your main monitor is using Display Port, you will be ok. But you will be limited to the following PPD on the headset and will not be able to use the bionic displays.
If however you want to use the bionic displays in the XR-3 to get the higher PPD detailed below in the screenshot, that is where you need to feed an external monitor with a seperate GPU like the internal GPU of your motherboard/cpu.
In essence, the XR-3 when enabled for the higher PPD uses 4 displays in the headset. 2 for the peripheral area displays AND 2 for the focus area displays (or bionic displays). SO 4 in total which is where Nvidia GPU limitations max out at driving 4 displays.
For AERO headsets, they do NOT have the bionic display technology and only have 2 displays to deal with. Hence why when using an external monitor with the AERO, you are in essence driving 3 displays, which falls under the Nvidia limitation of 4.
https://varjo.com/use-center/get-to-know-your-headset/getting-the-perfect-image-quality/#simple-rendering
Can I use multiple monitors with XR-4, XR-3 and VR-3? (varjo.com)
I will jump into Discord now and see what they are telling you as it may OR maynot be right or wrong.