The message 2 above hit on some of the basic points being brought up so I would like to address them in turn. The message above also has a good point.
What you are describing was how I remember the Jane's F/A-18E software handled easy AAR which came out in 1999. Get close to the refueling plane, push a button and AI takes over. You watched your plane hookup and get fuel and then break away releasing control back to the pilot.
I can't argue your point about priorities. F-16 needs mavericks, harms, etc. An Apache helicopter and F-15E Strike Eagle with fully functional cockpit would be a sure buy for me. And that is just the beginning.
It has been discussed whether unlimited fuel is a worthy substitute. For some the answer is no. Some pilots want the experience of having to watch their fuel and have enough to get to the refueler, use the TACAN to find the refueler, communicate with the refueler but as yet can't hook up and/or stay with the refueler to refuel.
An hour of practice and you are already hooking up to the basket for short periods of time is remarkable. This is well beyond what many of us are experiencing and as for me I am quite certain the hours of practice are in the double digits. That being said - about 10 pages ago I got some good suggestions and I too am hooking up for short periods of time. Very exhilarating even at my age. I am almost glad there is no easy AAR forcing me to learn AAR. (But then I am retired with no children and very independent wife.) AAR may become my favorite part of the mission.
I find that I need to refuel on a significant number of missions. Certainly the design of the Harrier makes it a must. But even the F/A-18c only has so many hardpoints. (Another priority would be the F/A-18E with more.) And I always seem to end up in the wrong place and have to dodge missiles which may mean afterburners which consumes fuel. Of course this may be indicative of poor mission planning and execution.
I am curious about something and perhaps it is a mistake to ask because using it may induce some bad habits. I keep hearing how some pilots are using trim and autopilot to help them hook up to the basket. Would some one explain how this is done.