topol-m Posted December 18, 2009 Posted December 18, 2009 ^^^ The vet is coming to check out this perverted dog :doh: 1 [sIGPIC][/sIGPIC]
Aeroscout Posted December 19, 2009 Posted December 19, 2009 I found this at the following website. http://www.createblog.com/forums/lofiversion/index.php/t135507.html I was laughing for 5 minutes until it hurt! :D Here goes: Okay, these are analogies and metaphors found in ACTUAL high school essays, so these aren't made up. 1) Her face was a perfect oval, like a circle that had its two sides gently compressed by a Thigh Master. 2) His thoughts tumbled in his head, making and breaking alliances like underpants in a dryer without Cling Free. 3) He spoke with the wisdom that can only come from experience, like a guy who went blind because he looked at a solar eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it and now he goes around the country speaking at high schools about the dangers of looking at a solar eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it. 4) She grew on him like she was a colony of E. coli and he was room-temperature Canadian beef. 5) She had a deep, throaty, genuine laugh, like that sound a dog makes just before it throws up. 6) Her vocabulary was as bad as, like, whatever. 7) He was as tall as a six-foot-three-inch tree. 8)The revelation that his marriage of 30 years had disintegrated because of his wife's infidelitly came as a rude shock, like a surcharge at a formerly surcharge-free ATM. 9) The little boat gently drifted across the pond exactly the way a bowling ball wouldn't. 10) McBride fell 12 stories, hitting the pavement like a Hefty bag filled with vegetable soup. 11) From the attic came an unearthly howl. The whole scene had an eerie, surreal quality, like when you're on vacation and Jeopardy comes on at 7:00 instead of 7:30. 12) Her hair glistened in the rain like a nose hair after a sneeze. 13) The hailstones leaped from the pavement, just like maggots when you fry them in hot grease. 14) Long separated by cruel fate, the star-crossed lovers raced across the grassy field toward each other like two freight trains, one having left Cleveland at 6:36 PM traveling at 55 mph, the other from Topeka at 4:19 PM at a speed of 35 mph. 15) John and Mary had never met. They were like two hummingbirds who had also never met. 16) He fell for her like he was a mob informant and she was the East River. 17) Even in his last years, Grandpappy had a mind like a steel trap, only one that had been left out so long, it had rusted shut. 18) The plan was simple, like my brother-in-law Phil. But unlike Phil, this plan just might work. 19) The young fighter had a hungry look, the kind you get from not eating for a while. 20) He was as lame as a duck. Not the metaphorical lame duck, either, but a real duck that was actually lame, maybe from stepping on a land mine or something. 21) The ballerina rose gracefully en pointe and extended one slender leg behind her, like a dog at a fire hydrant. 22) He was deeply in love. When she spoke, he thought he heard bells, as if she were a garbage truck backing up. 23) Her eyes were like limpid pools, only they had forgotten to put in any pH cleanser. 24) She walked into my office like a centipede with 98 missing legs. 25) It hurt the way your tongue hurts after you accidentally staple it to the wall. Enjoy! :D Aero :music_whistling: DCS Wishlist: 1) FIX THE DAMN RIVERS!!! 2) Spherical or cylindrical panorama view projection. 3) Enhanced input options (action upon button release, etc). 4) Aircraft flight parameter dump upon exit (stick posn, attitude, rates, accel, control volume, control-surface positions, SAS bias, etc). 5) ADS-33 maneuver courses as static objects. 6) Exposed API or exports of trim position and stick force for custom controllers. 7) Select auto multiple audio devices
topol-m Posted December 19, 2009 Posted December 19, 2009 ^^^ :laugh: What kind of idiots can write such garbage? [sIGPIC][/sIGPIC]
159th_Viper Posted December 19, 2009 Posted December 19, 2009 Ho Ho Ho Selecta 6Si01ax0uGo&feature=featured 1 Novice or Veteran looking for an alternative MP career? Click me to commence your Journey of Pillage and Plunder! [sIGPIC][/sIGPIC] '....And when I get to Heaven, to St Peter I will tell.... One more Soldier reporting Sir, I've served my time in Hell......'
Vault Posted December 19, 2009 Posted December 19, 2009 Classic series Viper, Aguilera's Crib is plain jokes. and Mel B's Holiday [sIGPIC][/sIGPIC]
topol-m Posted December 19, 2009 Posted December 19, 2009 ^^^ That looks like a suitcase nuke. :bomb: [sIGPIC][/sIGPIC]
topol-m Posted December 19, 2009 Posted December 19, 2009 topol-m ^^^ That post sounds a little bit like I`am raping a dog again :doh: [sIGPIC][/sIGPIC]
CyBerkut Posted December 19, 2009 Posted December 19, 2009 ^^^ That post sounds a little bit like I`am raping a dog again :doh: Or, perhaps the other way around... :shocking: 2 [sIGPIC][/sIGPIC] There's no place like 127.0.0.1
topol-m Posted December 19, 2009 Posted December 19, 2009 Or, perhaps the other way around... :shocking: Oh cr@p! That`s even worse. :D Correction needed :crazy: [sIGPIC][/sIGPIC]
monotwix Posted December 19, 2009 Posted December 19, 2009 Remarkable observation for which way around part. A bone for all. I know the human being and fish can coexist peacefully.
topol-m Posted December 19, 2009 Posted December 19, 2009 A bone for all. I really hope you mean "bone" as a part of the skeleton. :D I don`t want any other "bone". [sIGPIC][/sIGPIC]
monotwix Posted December 19, 2009 Posted December 19, 2009 Well there’s no other bones left. Just let me know what other bones you don’t wont and we’ll stick them to the regular rafecipe. Woof. I know the human being and fish can coexist peacefully.
Namenlos Ein Posted December 22, 2009 Posted December 22, 2009 (edited) Santa is dead. Ded Moroz rules! Edited December 22, 2009 by Namenlos Ein 2
159th_Viper Posted December 22, 2009 Posted December 22, 2009 Awe Namelos Ein that's Nasty............:P You know what's gonna Happen now, Dont you....... ............... ...................... ............................. Novice or Veteran looking for an alternative MP career? Click me to commence your Journey of Pillage and Plunder! [sIGPIC][/sIGPIC] '....And when I get to Heaven, to St Peter I will tell.... One more Soldier reporting Sir, I've served my time in Hell......'
Lucas_From_Hell Posted December 22, 2009 Posted December 22, 2009 21) The ballerina rose gracefully en pointe and extended one slender leg behind her, like a dog at a fire hydrant. :lol::lol::lol::lol:
Namenlos Ein Posted December 22, 2009 Posted December 22, 2009 The Russian laptop Barco MicroVista 4500
topol-m Posted December 24, 2009 Posted December 24, 2009 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X6yUCbqAGrg&feature=popt00us02 :furious: [sIGPIC][/sIGPIC]
zakobi Posted December 24, 2009 Posted December 24, 2009 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X6yUCbqAGrg&feature=popt00us02 :furious: :megalol:
topol-m Posted December 24, 2009 Posted December 24, 2009 Heavy metal dog :laugh: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WyISmg8ZKGw&feature=related 1 [sIGPIC][/sIGPIC]
Lucas_From_Hell Posted December 25, 2009 Posted December 25, 2009 I just can't believe in these paintings people do in their cars. It seems to be pretty common in Russia. I've seen one with a sea-turtle in a similar car. But, anyway, this guy has good taste.
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