Funny stuff ?!!

[Pilotasso]

[Avilator]

T1TL558Mz6Q

 

:thumbup:

[joey45]

clCEfA6XKmM

God this show always cracks me up :D :thumbup:

 

That has made my day.

[Pilotasso]

[hassata]

Idiot dog lol

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Down for the count:

VqtPUhYdz6M&feature=player_embedded

[zakobi]

* Helicopter tail rotors are naturally drawn toward trees, stumps, rocks, etc.

While it may be possible to ward off this event some of the time, it cannot, despite the best efforts of the crew, always be prevented.

It’s just what they do.

* The engine RPM and the rotor RPM must BOTH be kept in the GREEN.

Failure to heed this commandment can adversely affect the morale of the crew.

* The terms Protective Armor and Helicopter are mutually exclusive.

* “Chicken Plates” are not something you order in a restaurant.

* Loud, sudden noises in a helicopter WILL get your undivided attention.

* The further you fly into the mountains, the louder the strange engine noises become.

* It is a bad thing to run out of airspeed, altitude and ideas all at the same time.

* “Pucker Factor” is the formal name of the equation that states the more hairy the situation is, the more of the seat cushion will be sucked up your butt.

It can be expressed in its mathematical formula of:

S (suction) + H (height above ground) + I (interest in staying alive) + T (# of tracers coming your way).

* Running out of pedal, fore or aft cyclic, or collective are all bad ideas.

Any combination of these can be deadly.

* Helicopters have been described as nothing more than 50,000 parts flying in close formation. It is the mechanics responsibility to keep that formation as tight as possible.

* LZ’s are always hot.

* There are ‘old’ pilots and ‘bold’ pilots, but there are no ‘old, bold’ pilots.

Edited May 9, 2011 by zakobi

[zakobi]

F-111 Chicken:

Crosses the eight-lane highway both ways!

F/A-18E Chicken:

Crosses the road ahead of schedule and with less cost than expected

TSR.2 Chicken:

It tried hard to cross the road, but got beheaded before getting to the kerb

A-10 Chicken:

Tough enough to cross the road even when cars are about!

Rafale Chicken:

You see different colored feathers while it crosses, but cook it and it still tastes like… chicken.

F-15E Chicken:

Crosses the road fast, low, and very accurately, and wards off any cars that might want to knock it down.

F-16 Chicken:

Small, light, and agile, but seldom has enough fuel to reach the other side.

F-4 Chicken:

Getting elderly, but still in top form to take on tomorrows roads. Very ugly, but very effective.

Foxbat Chicken:

Crosses so fast it gets a speeding ticket!

E-3A Chicken:

Looks left, right, forward, back, up, down and all around, then directs all the other Chickens as to where is the safest place to cross.

F-117 Chicken:

Only crosses the road at night…

B-47 Chicken:

Tried to run, but got flattened by the B-52 Chicken

B-52 Chicken:

A rather elderly Chicken that crosses the road with noise, smoke, and a huge load, but can easily be knocked over by a car before it gets to the other side.

B-2 Chicken:

Nobody really knows…

SR-71 Chicken:

Can’t lay eggs, but if run on the correct JP-7 fodder can reach high enough speed to outrun any preying foxes, and can flap high enough to escape the clutches of their paws. Easily discernable by piping hot black feathers.

Stits SkyBaby Chicken:

Can’t cluck, and can’t lay eggs, but you can carry it across the road in your pocket

X-15 Chicken:

Crosses faster than any other chicken, but if you don’t dip it in liquid nitrogen first, it arrives on the other side fully cooked.

 

http://aviationhumor.net/page/10/

[Bucic]

Chicks are not complex. Chicks are unreasonable and chaotic :P

[Lucas_From_Hell]

Great link, zakobi :D

 

#1: Please divert your course 15 degrees to the North to avoid a collision.

#2: Recommend you divert YOUR course 15 degrees to South to avoid a collision.

 

#1: This is the Captain of a US Navy ship. I say again, divert YOUR course.

#2: No. I say again, you divert YOUR course.

 

#1. THIS IS THE AIRCRAFT CARRIER ENTERPRISE, WE ARE A LARGE WARSHIP OF THE US NAVY. DIVERT YOUR COURSE NOW!

#2. This is a lighthouse. Your call.

[Lucas_From_Hell]

I'd heard this one as "Biggles, the RAF ace," but Pierre will do just as well :D

 

Pierre, a brave French fighter pilot, takes his girlfriend, Marie, out for a pleasant little picnic by the River Seine. It’s a beautiful day and love is in the air.

Marie leans over to Pierre and says, ‘Pierre, kiss me!’

Pierre grabs a bottle of Merlot and splashes it on Marie’s lips.

‘What are you doing, Pierre ?’ says the startled Marie.

‘I am Pierre, the French fighter pilot! When I have red meat, I have red wine!’

She smiles and they start kissing.

Things began to heat up a little and Marie says, ‘Pierre, kiss me lower.’

Our hero tears her blouse open, grabs a bottle of Chardonnay and pours it on her breasts.

‘Pierre! What are you doing now?’ asks the bewildered Marie.

‘I am Pierre, the French fighter pilot! When I have white meat, I have white wine!’

She giggles and they resume their passionate interlude: and things really steam up.

Marie leans close to his ear and whispers, ‘Pierre, kiss me much lower!’

Pierre rips off her underwear, grabs a bottle of Cognac and pours it in her lap.

He then strikes a match and lights the cognac on fire.

Marie shrieks and dives into the River Seine.

Standing waist deep, Marie throws her arms into the air and screams furiously, ‘PIERRE , WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU ARE DOING?’

 

Our ‘hero’ stands and says defiantly, ‘I am Pierre, the French fighter pilot! If I go down, I go down in flames!’

[Grimes]

[bumfire]

 

 

ahahahahaaaaa :)

[Avilator]

 

I am just a little ashamed that I am of the same species that would do something like this.

But it's still kinda funny.

[Speed]

[asparagin]

...

 

[Falcon_S]

[hassata]

DCS IP Plays Black Ops

 

JPKFjpna5Iw

[bumfire]

^ loooooool

[Depth]

 

[Pilotasso]

aww I just ate :(

[monotwix]

Ah man that is terrific.

[Namenlos Ein]

aww I just ate :(

 

 

Ah man that is terrific.

Even more terrific how the irradiated food tastes.

[Pilotasso]

I ate worse things, like pig intestines and stuffed cow stomach. :D

 

meanwhile:

[monotwix]

Have you ever managed to fold a cat properly?

[Depth]