my opinion, without more ram and lowering ones expectations on Visuals, you will not have a smooth DCS experience. Especialy if you go Online on public servers.
i think it startet with the fact that planes in Early access come out on beta first, sometimes several weeks early. and people want to fly them, also in MP. and servers just stuck with OB
the issue is the movement of the 16000 Throttle (the one on the stick obviously) is just one inch. what i do on a2a refueling is, setting the throttle so that i am slightly faster and just pulse the airbrake to stay in position
negative commets have the same right to exist unless they violate the forum rules.
so i am afraid you have to deal with them even if you dont like them or find them offensive
the only way i found so far to transport data between the different Enviroments are either sockets or simply writing and reading a file. and yes its a pita.
(between cockpit and Export its a bit easier because you set and read gauges)