Good post mate.
Our wing requires people to have a basic understanding of the F18. Recruits need to be able to as a minimum land and take off from a land base; the rest we'll teach. A good positive attitude and willingness to constantly learn. Being able to fly a minimum of twice a week or more. We find those who fly less lose the perishable skills. A social personality is a must on a wing. You will become friends with those you fly with. People who do not get along with others in real life might as well avoid joining a wing because they are a social group with various personalities. Finally, taking the initiative and practicing on your own is a good thing.
Our wing uses teamspeak and SRS so having a good headset is a must. We recommend Warthog HOTAS and Oculus Rift since 90% of our pilots fly in VR. TrackIR is also acceptable. We use teamspeak to brief and debrief but never during flights. Comms are always done through SRS.
Skills that we look for and teach:
Basic aircraft handling
Radio operation and communication land and sea
Navigation including TACAN radials, WPT, arrival and departures VFR and IFR
A2A Refueling
Formation flying including lead wingman responsibilities
A2A and A2G combat
Tactical weapons employment
Carrier Operations CASE 1, 2, and 3 including radio calls etc
I'm probably forgetting something but that's off the top of my head.
Finally, being able to follow directions is a must as a wingman. Our wing does not support or keep lone wolf pilots, since it completely defeats the point of belonging to a wing.