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Married with children?


Devrim

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Hi...

 

I know there're guys married with (or without) children. My question is that "how are you doing it?" I mean how can you keep married with your wife, children and DCS?

 

We have a baby (girl) two months ago. Ok, my wife is doing all stuff about baby. But I can't help myself to care them frequently.

 

After every 15 minutes, I go and check them, I can't play a mission without interruption. Am I too sensitive?

 

How do you do that? :)

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Split with my misses now have a'lot more time to play DCS see my son 4 years old during the day and game at night. :thumbup:

 

You should get you're own time give you're wife a break during the day and then she should return the favour at night when you're gaming! :thumbup:

 

Ps. Having a baby should give you a'lot of free time when he/she is in bed at night. :)

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I moved in with a girl who has a baby. Yes my DCS time has dropped almost to zero. The sim must work flawlessly to get a decent flight every now and then. That's why I have been upgrading systems and controllers lately and trying to set everything up so well that every time I have free time, I could just sit down and fly instead of fighting some problem.

Would help if she did more housework as I'm the only one with a job and still doing half of the housework. And on weekends I'm still the one waking up early to take care of the kid! Ok, end of rant. :D

I often miss the old times though I don't exactly regret moving in with her. If only the work load would be evenly split, my life would be seriously easier!

 

Real life really takes too much time and is overrated. :D

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I was with a GF who was divorced and already had a child. I Stopped flying because I moved over to hers and did not take my machine with me. There was little space in such small house, I used her laptop for the essentials and no gaming (there was no time either).

 

After less than a year we decided to split and I was back to my old habits. :D

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I almost finished my DCS campaign this spring, than the wife and baby came back from the step parents visit..

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My wife is addicted to boring TV shows, so I withdraw to the man cave whenever she's staring at the idiot box.

 

No kids thank god. She wants some within the next few years but I have too much time/money-consuming fun-stuff to do before a kid takes all my time and money.

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No kids thank god. She wants some within the next few years but I have too much time/money-consuming fun-stuff to do before a kid takes all my time and money.

 

I got a son last night...

It's the only valuable thing you leave behind in life...

He will be my wingman... any time... :thumbup:

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Nealius, i guess you will not succeed in showing her why she's watching frying-neurons tv programs if you leave to your favorite military simulation each time it happens ;)

I tried to "educate" (maybe this word is not adequate but you get the sense) mine each day, with some shows meant to dream of living it,or at least, see some others things. Right now, i've almost succeeded with stargate, farscape, BSG, G.o.Thrones,The walking dead... It's been some time i hadn't seen any Leonard, Sheldon, or any other person i would not be in another life ;)

But for video games, it's harder. She doesn't want to fly spaceships, nor helicopters. :( "it's too hard and not fun" she said.

Oh i guess i'm lucky, any coop fps/tps game, she's in. (borderlands and co.)

 

been 5y, no kids. have 3y left before kids, so ED, please rush on EDGE ! you're my last hope to show her why flying is beautiful ! ;)

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No Wife, no kids. Starting to think Marriage is overrated TBH. Once it all goes South you have these secret family courts robbing you of your children and money with Marxist-Feminist social workers saying all sorts about you.

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He will be my wingman... any time... :thumbup:

 

Yup that sounds right, Having a son was the only decent thing i did with my life other than the Army. The joy he gets out looking at my desktop picture of the Bell Huey when he comes over i know he will be flying around on sim's in no time.

 

"show me more pictures of planes dad!" can't beat the small moments like that. :thumbup:

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Nealius, i guess you will not succeed in showing her why she's watching frying-neurons tv programs if you leave to your favorite military simulation each time it happens ;)

 

Oh, I know exactly why. "Chit-chat" is so much more fun than actually doing something that she enjoys watching other people chit-chat :joystick: Social creatures confuse the hell out of me.

 

I did get her onto BattleStar Galactica a year or so ago.

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Married, no kids: Too much hobbys :)

Building a simpit, remote controlled helicopters, pinball machines.

My wife loves books and is reading much on the couch.

 

So we have a big planner on the desk. If she needs me while building the pit I stop and help her. I am doing many things in the house due we are both working full and my wife is handicapped. We share the homework.

BUT ... once a week in autum, winter there is a mark in the calender:

"9 p.m. Flying with the guys". She knows that I am for hours in the simpit with cigarettes and a bottle water :) I interrupt flying once, this is for a good night kiss.

 

So in my case ... wife first, all other way back later.

 

My tip for you: Family is number one ! But try to give your wife some time without the kid and also try to get some hours a week for your hobby. Partnetship is to give and get , this works for us for more than 25 years now :thumbup:

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You're right Tom. :)

 

I do it (giving my family time) intentionally. As I said, after 15 mins, I feel uncomfortable and want to check home in feeling of "what's going on there?" :)

 

Before baby, I used to inform her about my flight and (as you said) just interrupt my flight for goodnight kiss. She is academician and she was in the books all the time. Life "was" easier for my Ka-50 flights. But now, everything has changed. :)

 

I can hardly manage sharing my time. Ooookay; Things what must be done must be done. So, I only can fly at nights (late nights) when they're in sleep...

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My wife supports my flightsim-hobby, so I'm pretty lucky on this part.

 

On the Daddy-Part, I can only speak of 2 weeks experience, but so far, it's working pretty good. :happy:

 

Sleeping is far overrated, anyways.

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I do it by dividing time between simming and them. We go out to picnic at the beach once in a while. Every single time we need to buy grocery, household items etc all of us go as family. Except work and jogging, I never, ever go anywhere without them. People forget quality time can be spend just by being together even at a grocery store. Be good to them and they allow you sim time. :D

ED have been taking my money since 1995. :P

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I do it by dividing time between simming and them. We go out to picnic at the beach once in a while. Every single time we need to buy grocery, household items etc all of us go as family. Except work and jogging, I never, ever go anywhere without them. People forget quality time can be spend just by being together even at a grocery store. Be good to them and they allow you sim time. biggrin.gif

 

Spot on there Leafer :)

 

 

 

I am married with a 3.5 year old.

 

I have been a gamer for years and before our child arrived I had so much time to spend gaming, but a part of me also though that maybe I spent a tad too much time on the PC.

 

Having a child changed all of that, you just don't realise what you did with all your spare time before they arrived.

 

I try to split everything 50/50 with my wife so that we both get some downtime when we need it (although she sees it more as 60/40!). I think its really important that you each get some time to yourself now and again for your sanity!

 

If I get time on the PC , its at the end of the night , or maybe snatch 30 mins on a saturday or something,

 

I had my daughter on my lap whilst I took off in the SU-25T the other day , she loved it, but loved the parachute the most, so I kept having to eject!


Edited by scottt
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Married, no kids: Too much hobbys :)

Building a simpit, remote controlled helicopters, pinball machines.

My wife loves books and is reading much on the couch.

 

So we have a big planner on the desk. If she needs me while building the pit I stop and help her. I am doing many things in the house due we are both working full and my wife is handicapped. We share the homework.

BUT ... once a week in autum, winter there is a mark in the calender:

"9 p.m. Flying with the guys". She knows that I am for hours in the simpit with cigarettes and a bottle water :) I interrupt flying once, this is for a good night kiss.

 

So in my case ... wife first, all other way back later.

 

My tip for you: Family is number one ! But try to give your wife some time without the kid and also try to get some hours a week for your hobby. Partnetship is to give and get , this works for us for more than 25 years now :thumbup:

 

I do it by dividing time between simming and them. We go out to picnic at the beach once in a while. Every single time we need to buy grocery, household items etc all of us go as family. Except work and jogging, I never, ever go anywhere without them. People forget quality time can be spend just by being together even at a grocery store. Be good to them and they allow you sim time. :D

 

You fellas have been pretty much spot on. My wife for the most part part supports my hobby as well. She 's has her games she and girls play so that opens my time up also. With having 2 daughters 18 & 14 they pretty much do their own thing also. We do, however, try to make a date night to help us along.

 

Dont get me wrong, we do have our share of issues also that goes back into quality time. These are the warning flags that tell you to get the priorities together. Bottom line is that you have to figure what works best for your home and relationship. You just have to WORK at it. :)

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No Wife, no kids. Starting to think Marriage is overrated TBH. Once it all goes South you have these secret family courts robbing you of your children and money with Marxist-Feminist social workers saying all sorts about you.

 

Love is highly unlikely but it happens. :D Me? I never got into a true unconditional relationship. After analysing all my relationships with a cool head I realised this. There has always been some reason or personal problem in their lives that made my approach convenient, it was never love I'm afraid. But I when it happened I couldn't be with her :( Some couples I know made it though. But that's about 10% of the total. :D

 

In the modern society some values have faded away, people are more sceptical and overall more selfish as the years went on. I met Girls when I was age 14 more human and with a more mature posture than some of those aged 30 I know now. :P

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I have a baby boy going on to 6 months now.

The first 8 weeks were pretty tough getting into the new role as parents. You need to stick together there.

Don't forget that your wife is experiencing all kinds of hormonal changes. She needs you during those first weeks/months.

I did cease to fly during that period.

 

After a month or three, things started to settle down regarding the emotional aspects of the birth, but of course 'regular life' and work started to become more prominent again.

This took, yet again, some readjusting.

 

Now, coming on to six months I am starting to have room again for simming. The baby requires less attention now (as does the wife ;) ).

 

What we do is just plan. Mark a specific day in the week that you reserve for simming and make an agreement that at that time you can just have several hours of undisturbed sim time.

 

Planning is paramount. And don't fret; you should go with the flow at first, man. DCS will wait. Your family needs you. And the beauty is that if you have been nothing but supportive in the first weeks, you will get that in return in spades if you cooperate well with your wife later on. At least that's my story.

 

Congrats on becoming a dad! It's magnificent isn't it?!

 

P.S. I don't get the people making a fuss about getting married because of the implied ties it causes, while at the same time having a baby is less of a problem. To me there is no greater commitment than a child. (not targeting someone specific, just a general addition)


Edited by Yskonyn

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I have to say marriage is great.

 

Kids are not something I'm in to. I have a low tolerance for stress as it is and children in general drive me nuts. That's on top of my IBS/Crohn's that I really don't want to pass on to anyone else, much less my own children.

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Together with better half for 19 years already, married for 14 with two kids, Daughter 10 and Son 14. My Family, the reason for my existence :)

 

Once you pass the terrible two's and get to the three-and-over stage then your stress-levels start decreasing with the first wee one. With the second one it's a walk-in-the-park from day 1 as it's all been done before :D

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  • ED Team

It's a balancing act, and buying stuff for the misses to ensure flight time... as an example, today she got a bread machine, tonight I fly :)

 

Seriously though... with a 1 year old I have to pick my moments, end of the day, she is only 1 for a short time, DCS will be there for a lot longer... she gets the priority right now :)

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